2am. rahhs. shld be sleeping.
just dont have the mood for anything now.
bad bad weekend. made some wrong choices which led to many unhappy people
i know i shldnt be saying this but i hate myself right now.
okay. wait. really shldnt have typed that cuz im insulting God who made me.
but really disappointed with myself, whatever has happened etc.
i need to change.
yet i am afraid. afraid that i will fail again.
seriously this is bad.
bad weekend. bad. bad bad. cannot see the light.
if only things would go a certain way. but it wont. it wont. this is going to cost me $$, my and other people's emotions.
in other news,
i finally went running with my new shoes this morning
short 20 min run but was pretty much wiped out after that.
i hope to run more this june instead of swim cuz im guess the pools will be infested with kids.
haha. and running is free where as swimming i have to pay for entrance and locker. but i get to shower.
but traveling to the pool is a challenge.
anyway, everyone should exercise!
had ONE camp meeting today.
it was quite fun.anyway, still feeling depressed.havent felt so sad in a long time
shall go do QT.
hope this week i can find a job of some kind.
ugh.
