havent been able to get ANY sleep. it's 7:17am. it's terrible. was wide awake the whole night. it really made me think about lots of stupid things. i felt fearful. the feeling of being alone, failure, rejection etc. it's that helpless feeling. decided to get up and journal since i couldnt really pray without more negative thoughts getting into my head. i wonder if these thoughts are for real or just only when im feeling tired and stressed. journaled a long prayer to God. i know it's not really right to dump everythg on Him. but i felt really desperate for someone to hear me out. i feel better after writing it all out. tonight, one thing i have learnt is that God can very well easily take away the things that He has given u and u have taken forgranted of. felt really scared. im glad my faith in God has helped me through the journalling because as i wrote, the things i learned about God came back to me slowly which gave me confidence in the almighty one. His plans for me are PERFECT, He always thinks of me and He never puts me through what i cannot bear. yup. hmm..wonder if i should go to bed now. at 730. all that's in my mind is the tea reception for the engineering course later. i dont feel like going. but i hope that God will reveal something to me during the talk. i should not doubt God's plans for me because He does not make any mistakes. give me the strength God.
